SEXCAPADES

Is that a word?  I haven’t written erotica since 1999.  I’m going to try some auto-biographical erotica now…

            We agreed to meet for the first time at the Brick, in Roslyn.  A measly 4 blocks from me but a good hour and a half drive for him.  Then there was that pesky 18 wheeler that skid and blocked all three lanes, stopping traffic dead on the 90 for an hour.  Oh, and it was starting to snow.  He said his van didn’t do snow.   It seemed like a lot of trouble to meet someone for the very first time.  Now I was feeling nervous, what if he got here and decided it really wasn’t worth all the effort?  What if he dies on the road because of the weather conditions?   What if he doesn’t come at all?  However, those kinds of thoughts are the enemy.  

            I walked out into the living room, which was warm and cozy from our stellar wood stove with its “magic heat” blower.   My mom was lounging in front of the TV.  She gave me a look then said, “Don’t wear that belt, the dress poofs out and makes you look pregnant.” 

            Fuck.

            Okay, so I go and change my clothes and I’m actually glad she said something because I feel 10 times more confident and comfortable in some black leggings layered with a tanktop and sweater.  I laughed, relieved, and put on the feather earrings my friend C, in Venice gave me (she had an ex boyfriend that once told her he had a present for her and then dropped trow to reveal a glittery g-string barely covering his junk.  But I digress).  They are bright and long and don’t match.  They rock.  

            Not too much makeup, but a little smoke around the eyes; thick layer of gloss on the lips.  With the makeup on I can see a glimpse of the vixen-maiden from what seems like forever ago.  She smiles and winks at me.  I remember when She felt confident about Herself, obstacles would melt from Her path at the mere sight of Her.  Portals would open in the Universe and She wanted to step through them.  I remember it like it was a past life but even now She still comes and goes briefly.  

Okay…I get that so far this is nowhere near erotica, but give me a chance, I think I can get there…

            I have this body spray that smells like cotton candy.  I find it incredibly yummy and I know its good because My daughter and her friends are always sniffing me and telling me I smelled nice.  When I was in LA and saw my old FWB he confirmed its appeal.  I made sure that I didn’t spray too much.

           It was still snowing when I left the house and I loved walking in it.  The first snow of the year.  I still had a couple hours before the date, and I wanted to meet some friends at the Eagles first for some shots of Fireball and good conversation.

Fast forward a couple hours…

            It’s about 9:30 and I’m at the Pasttime when I realize that people don’t have great cell service in this town so I had better go to the Brick and see if he’s there.  As I’m walking down the white, sparkling sidewalk, I see a man get out of a van and begin to head towards the Brick.  I think it’s him.  He’s cuter than I thought he’d be.  He was one of those that had a ton of really old pictures on his profile.  I mean ones from highschool.      He is part of the poly scene in Seattle that I tapped into on OKC.  I still haven’t made it to any of their meet and greets, but I corresponded with him and one of his partners.  Then I spoke to him on the phone for awhile.  I have never met anyone who has read more Pierce Anthony novels than I.  May I say that I was a little more than intrigued?  

I realize now that I am switching tenses.    I should just pick one and stick with it.

            I waited a minute then took a deep breathe, then I pulled open the doors and walked in.  A friendly chat with the bouncer who always waves me through saying, “Oh I know you,” makes me feel all special and local.  I scan the room and see him standing there staring at me.

Fuck! I switched tenses again! So fucking amateaur…

            When I’m nervous and have to speak, I go on autopilot. 

            I said, “Hey, you look familiar.”

            He said something which I don’t remember because I was on autopilot but I do remember that he was wearing a warm smile behind a nicely trimmed beard, blue eyes and dark, thick hair.  I bought him a drink to show that I was truly flattered that he made such a treacherous journey to come and meet me.  We sit down to talk but the band is loud.  After our drink we decide to go to his van and smoke.  It’s a conversion van, with a bed in it!  This is so extremely cool because I cannot and will not bring anyone home.  It began to dawn on me that I was going to possibly get laid tonight.  He shows me that he brought tequila and grenadine and all this stuff to make me drinks.  He remembered that I like tequila.  I can tell that he likes to give, and I see darkness there too.  I reach into my coat pocket and instinctively finger my knife.  Always there in case I get myself into a compromising position.

            During our conversation we start to slowly touch hands, intertwining fingers, caressing each other’s palms.  He comments that he appreciates what a sensual creature I am.  “And by the way, you’re gorgeous.”  

            I think that my response gave away that I’m incredibly self conscious.  Every compliment that he offered had me giggling or trying to return the compliment without seeming like I thought he was fishing for compliments.  I’m too much in my head ALL of the time.  Even when having sex sometimes.  I focused myself and tried to stay present.          

  

            What interesting things he had to say! He had read practically all of the the same sci-fi books that I had and way more.  He even sheepishly made a Supernatural reference that I totally got.  I didn’t feel embarrassed about all of the goddess mythology references I kept making.  Oh Aphrodite isn’t light and airy at all, She is the primal force behind desire… or, I theorize that the resurrection of Jesus is actually based on the Sumerian story of Innana’s descent… Our kindred inner nerds were totally bonding.  As we explored each other’s heads with our conversation, our hands continued exploring the outer perimeters of our bodies.  

            He felt nice, but I never know if I’m really attracted to a person on a base, physical level unless I kiss them.  I think it’s a truly chemical thing.  One taste and I know.  Whatever chemical reaction happens they taste good, with a pheromone-sweetness on my tongue.  

I can’t remember if we kiss at this point or not! Holy shit that is so fucked up…we went to the van, and then to the pastime and had another drink. Then back to the van…I know we kissed in the van, but was it before the pastime or after?...

            I think that we did not kiss at this point, and go to the Passtime for a drink.  This time he buys mine.  I know many of the people there, and I think this is the first time they’ve seen me on a date.  However, they have seen me get down with another woman in there before.  My date got up to go to the bathroom and a friend at the bar says, “Oh, someone’s gonna get some tonight,” and fist-pounds me.  I make it blow up.  We left and head back to the van.  My friend S said we could park in the alley in front of her house if we want.  We did.

Every act of consenting pleasure is an act of worship under Goddess…

            I sat on the bed in the back of the van and he leaned in to kiss me.  I noticed that yes, he is sweet.  I am more of a lip nibbler and he liked to circle and flick his tongue around the tip of mine.  Neither of us are tongue thrusters, not that I mind receiving the thrust I just don’t like to thrust myself. 

Yes I am trying to be erotic, and yes I know I was close and then just went into nerdy…

            Tilting my chin back, I exposed my neck, my most erogenous as well as overlooked zone.  He leans back a little to glimpse the skin on my throat, then begins to lay the most tender kisses there.  His lips were so soft and cozy that if it had not been for the beard, I would have thought a woman was kissing me.  A warmth ignited deep inside my pussy that began to spread up and throughout the rest of my body, and I knew I was very, very wet.  

            My sweater came off and I freed my arms from the straps of the tank top underneath.  He leaned back against some pillows to get a better look.  I leaned forward to kiss him again and as I did he accomplished that coveted in high school – one handed -bra unsnapping move.  My breasts rewarded him by tumbling forward into his mouth.

            My nipples used to be incredibly sensitive.  Since breastfeeding, however, there is nothing more ecstatic than having them sucked.  I think it’s because my daughter didn’t eat very much and I produced so much milk that sometimes when I laid on my back my nipples would shoot mini fountains.  Oh they would ache so bad and then get real hot and spill.

            Eyes rolling back in my skull, my sense of time and reality began to shimmer and fairy dust dazzled and glistened on skin.  He was intoxicating.  I felt between worlds, submerged, even lost.  My leggings had tiptoed off somewhere with my panties, and soon he was kissing, nibbling and licking the inside of my thighs.    His fingers converged upon my wetness and it delighted him.   Beginning to explore inside me now, he curved his index and middle fingers up towards himself, hitting my g-spot perfectly.  His tongue found my clit, lightning shot through my spine, my back was arched in rapture and I was calling out for Earth and Sky.  The climax detonated and I catapulted to the Underworld, to the Heavens.  From there I softly floated back into the van.  When I came to and regained awareness of where I was again, I just started to giggle. I always giggle  after I cum but I also realized that I had orgasmed in a record less than two minutes.  It usually takes me at least 10.

BEST BLOW JOB EVER!