Friday, January 23, 2009

Interesting happenings and rambles (aka update on my life)

The first week of the semester and school is already kicking my ass! However, I love my classes, and my professors. I'm trying an online class this semester and so far I love it! I'm going to be doing what I love most this cycle. Reading, writing, and talking about reading and writing. Since I'm a Women's Studies major, I get to read and write about women! How great is my life?

If you asked me what I would do if I won the lottery, I would say, "travel, see lots of live music, and read and write instead of working." Ummm, hello? I don't need lots of money to live my dream. That in itself feels so freeing.

Recently I posted about how the Universe will drop something delicious into my lap this year. It would be something that I would not even imagine could happen to me. I also posted during my pluto transit phase that pluto is supposed to leave a great gift after fucking up your house. Well, I think it's happening.

Yesterday, I get an email from the assistant editor of HUSTLER magazine. She is a woman and a mother by the way. I still have no idea how she found me, but Apparently HUSTLER has a column called "College Report." I was asked to cover the Esha Momeni story at CSUN. I was asked to write a 750 word feminist piece with pictures for a national porno magazine. A magazine that has a 99% male readership. A readership that I now have an opportunity to appeal to. God Damn, I'm gonna make feminism sexy!

And I am going to be paid $1 per word!!!!!! I know labels suck but my whole life I've wanted to call myself a "freelance writer." I need to not only be published, but be paid in order to hold that title. Ahem, Well folks, ask me what I "do" please. I won't hate on you anymore. Because I'm gonna say that I'm a freelance writer!

This certainly falls into the category of something that I could not have imagined would happen to me this year.

It's amazing how the same things that excite me, and bring me joy, also give me panic attacks (please pass the bong and the prozac). I'm scared shitless. This is so different for me. Before I had no credibility and when I spoke my "radical" ideas, people rolled their eyes at me. So I made an effort to make myself smaller. Instead of choosing to burn brightly like the sun, I chose to cover myself with dark clouds and rain and burn resentfully and quietly behind them.

On my recent visit to my high priestess in Ojai, she told me that I do a dis-service not only to myself but to the world by making myself smaller. She said it was time to shine. Yesterday when I spoke in my "women and violence" class, I thought I would get a lot of eye rolls. Instead, the entire class applauded. Of course this made me turn red and sweat profusely, I can't help it. But I also felt so good. I felt like I'm a capable human being with something important to say. For a moment, I felt like a Goddess who has mastery of this human form instead of struggling with being human all of the time. It felt as good as falling in love.

I was given a beautiful, green stone by my high priestess to keep for her until she calls on it again. I am so honored, because this stone has been used for many years by so many women in various Goddess ritual to invoke Earth, including the founders, and including myself. Below is a picture of it on my altar. next to it you see a spell card and it is for health. The other spell card next to my cauldron is for wisdom. The candle behind it is a candle spell a very sweet, Goddess women made and gave to me with a picture of Themis holding scales. This is a spell for social justice that I have been burning through for almost 2 years. My altar is my own little Universe that I control and create. It represents what I want my reality to hold.


Ojibway Migisi Bineshii said...

I am so excited that you will be writing for Hustler! I have never picked up that magazine in my life but may have to do so to read your article.

I love your altar (is it?) by the way. What crystals do you have on there?

dollyspeaks said...

I'm glad so many wonderful things are turning up for you. It's time good things happen for you! :)

I didn't realize you were a women's studies major either. I knew from our profile you were interested, but it's so cool that you're so dedicated to it! Most people I know (including myself) are simply minors.

Kudos on speaking up in your women and violence class too. It's hard to share things in rooms full of people like that, but it sounds like you got a wonderful reception--as you deserved! ^_^

Sloth Womyn said...

yes, that is my altar!
I'm not sure what the big, green stone is, but I associate it with the heart, maybe because of it's color. I have many crystals, but the one that I have been really working with is Citrine. Are you familiar with that one?

Thanks for the kudos, Dolly! A women's studies minor is awesome too!

I went last night and interviewed people for the article. I felt so cool! It will be coming out in the June issue.

Ojibway Migisi Bineshii said...

Yeah I am familiar with citrine. I have rose quartz, quartz, lapis lazuli, amethyst and many others.

When I was a kid someone dumped at least 20-30 quartz crystals outside their apartment window in the alley nearby. I knew it was such a sign. My friend and I collected all of these crystals and I still have some from that day.

Rocks and crystals are so wonderful!

Stevie said...

excited to pick up this Hustler.

Keep up the good work Robin.

carrot quinn said...

*walks up to you in the bar*

"So, uh- what do you DO?"

I have already started calling myself a writer, based just on the sheer quantity of my writing. I've piled up enough around me and underneath my that I think I'm protected from having to ever not be a writer again.

Sloth Womyn said...

You crack me up, Carrot.

"protected from not ever being a writer again." -so ridiculous, so true!

Is "what do you DO" the first thing one gets asked everywhere?